Bah Humbug!

People that know me also know that I don't care for the holidays. First of all, I'm not particularly religious and even if I was, I would be skeptical of December 25 actually being a day of significance. Mostly it's the commercialism that completely turns me off. The damn lights started going up here before Thanksgiving and this town actually has a radio station that plays all Christmas music all of the time. Bah! Who needs the extra stress of fighting crowds at the mall to find that one special knick-knack to give your secret Santa so he/she will have something else to dust all year because it never gets moved. Truly I wish I could hibernate from Thanksgiving until the New Year. Unfortunately, I don't think I'm going to get that luxury this year. The Girlfriend is all about some Christmas. And the poor thing moved in with a man that hasn't put up a Christmas tree in five years. I'm gonna try to be cheerful about the whole process. Just because I wish it would go away doesn't mean I'm gonna be a Scrooge and ruin her holiday. I'm guessing that I will be hauling home a tree soon and will have to put up with the damn blinking lights and tinsel. *Sigh.* By the way, my attitude has nothing to do with the fact that I have no idea what to buy anybody for Christmas.

Amandapalooza Winding Down

I could never live in Vegas. I would be dead in a week. The cause would probably be something like "spontaneous liver rebellion." A drink in your hand is THE accessory in Las Vegas and I don't think I was without one the entire time I was awake.


The Girlfriend and I touched down in Vegas about ten or so on Thursday. We spent the next couple of hours cruising the strip like true tourists. The Girlfriend ooohed and ahhhed all of the lights and casino interiors, but it wasn't until she came across a huge set of balls that she really got excited.

Later that evening, I took her to the Tournament Of Kings at the Excalibur. I knew that the show would be cheesy and I wasn't sure if The Girlfriend would like eating with her hands, but she seemed to enjoy all of the simulated violence. Then we went to see Zumanity at New York, New York. Let's just say I picked a good one.

I gambled for a bit, playing some $5 blackjack, The Girlfriend would watch a little bit, then go to a quarter blackjack machine, play three or four hands, cash out and run back to me to announce that she had won 75 cents! I teased her relentlessly about being a tightwad, but she was enjoying herself and that was what was important.

We spent the next day checking out more of the sights, the fountains at Bellagio, the volcano at the mirage, ate lunch at the Venetian and then toured Tussauds House of Wax. I think I had a good time.

We went to see the Blue Man Group that night. I was very entertained but I think The Girlfriend was confused at first. She kept looking for a point to the show. Ultimately, I think she enjoyed it right up until the time that I spilled my entire drink in her purse. She didn't get TOO mad, but I knew that she subtracted points for my clumsiness.

Oh, how could I forget!?!?! Before the Blue Man Group, we managed to hook up with one of The Girlfriend's blogger buddies, Cindy. There are pictures somewhere, but I think Cindy has them.

By this time I had started to come down with the cold that The Girlfriend had been fighting and didn't feel very well, so we called it a night and ordered room service.

The next day, we flew back to Nashvegas and watched the Preds smack down the Red Wings, 6-2. Oh, did I mention that while I was in Vegas I placed a bet at the sports book on the Preds? If the Preds win the cup, I win $800, enough for another trip to sin city.

So today, Amandapalooza is winding down. My nose is running non stop, there is dirty laundry everywhere, The Girlfriend keeps looking at me and saying "Zumanity was really good wasn't it?" and my dogs are glad to be home from the kennel. We are going to go watch the Titan's play the Giants today and hopefully it will be a good game. There is some excitement because the game has been moved to 3:15 and The Girlfriend will get to see her first night game (It will get dark around 4:30 I think.). I really hope she enjoyed her birthday and I really hope I survive this cold. Please excuse the rambling nature of this post, the sudafed and cough syrup combined with the leftover alcohol in my system makes for a foggy existence.

Seacrest out.

10/10

I've been in Nashville for a week or so, long enough to know that I like it. I woke up this morning mentally listing the things I like about Smashville and the things I miss about where I used to live. I thought I would share.

10 THINGS I LIKE ABOUT LIVING IN NASHVILLE

1. Hills. West Tennessee is flat. I mean really flat. You can't find a decent slope until you get to the bluffs on the Mississippi River. When I lived in Knoxville, I got used to the hills in the city. It just seemed to add variety to the landscape. I didn't realize how much I missed that until I moved here.

2. Restaurants. Nashville has a bizillion places to eat and I don't mean Applebee's and O'Charley's. I ate at a place called The Grape last week. You would never find a place like that in the backwater where I used to live.

3. The new house. It's comfortable, roomy, on top of a hill and has a huge back yard for the dogs. I really like it.

4. The Predators/Titans. I already liked them before I moved here, but now going to a game is a 15 minute drive as opposed to a 2 hour road trip. Last week we were sitting around and just decided "Hey, let's go to a hockey game." Gotta like it.

5. The Girl . I know she feels better here. All of the history in Nashville will be OUR history. She doesn't have to worry about the stuff I shared with the ex-wife. I know her stress level is down.

6. The airport. I'm 10 minutes from anywhere. It's the same thing as number 4. Instead of a 2 hour drive just to get on the plane, we can throw our shit in a bag and go.

7. The Tennessean . I know, a newspaper is hardly reason to move, but it contains REAL news, not just obituaries and wedding announcements. This place feels like the real world.

8. The malls. I hate to shop, really I hate it. But, if you gotta go, at least your choices here are more varied than Sears and J.C. Penny's.

9. The work. No, I don't have a job yet. I'm not worried. There are umpteen hospitals here and I have no fear of finding work. I've been putting it off until after Thanksgiving and Las Vegas. No point in getting work only to say "I know I've only been here for a week, but I need four days off." The place I used to live had two hospitals and zero choice. You either worked for the evil empire or you worked at the hospital that continuously struggled. Christmas is coming, so my old job will soon start talking about "slow time" and "cutting back on hours." It was always a pain in the ass to know you wouldn't be making enough money right at the time of year that you knew you needed it more.

10. Broadway and Printer's Ally. Party spots in Nashville. I don't go out that much, but at least now I have the option of going to real bars and hot spots and not just "Bubba's Bar and Grill."



So, I'm thinking about the things I like about Nashville this morning and the companion to that is the things I miss about where I used to live. So here are the 10 things I miss about my old town and house.

1. NOTHING. Sorry, it's anticlimactic I know. Deal

Two Dollar Beer Night

The Girlfriend and I were tired of unpacking boxes and hanging pictures yesterday, so we decided to go to the hockey game last night. I managed to find some tickets right behind the Predators bench and even though you didn't have a clear view of the shoot twice end of the rink, we were right on top of the action at the bench. Every time Jason Arnott would swing a leg over the wall, the girlfriend would emit a little moan and bend at her knees a bit. I think she enjoyed the game. The Predators lost in a shoot out, 7-6, but we at least got a point. The goals came fast a furious and it was a very entertaining game. Shae Weber took a stick to the face and when he came back to the bench, he was sitting right in front of us. He was slinging blood on the ice and yelling at the refs. The Girlfriend was all "ewww he's bleeding!" but I could see the excitement in her eyes. The beer was only two bucks per draught until the first intermission, so I was feeling no pain by the time all of this happened. Overall, it was a good night and we were very glad that we decided to go see the game.

Nashvegas

I made it, I guess. The Girlfriend and I managed to move everything we own to Nashvegas with little more than a couple of cross words and some bruises. She did a great job of finding us a house and the dogs love their new backyard. Yesterday, I had to run some errands and found nirvana. Women may or may not understand this, I'm not sure, but when I came across "Dodson's Barbershop" I spun the Batmobile around and practically ran into the shop.

A little background would be helpful I guess. I used to get my hair cut at "City Barbers" in Memphis. I couldn't understand a damn thing the old geezers in there were saying. I swear one of them looked and sounded just like Floyd from "The Andy Griffith Show." They would cut your hair with clippers, shave the back of your neck with a straight razor (after stropping it just like you see in the movies), trim your eyebrows, snip any errant nose hairs and just generally spruce you up so that maybe a member of the opposite sex would give you a second look. All of that for six bucks.

Then I moved to a much smaller town in West Tennessee. You'd think that barbers would be plentiful in a town that thinks an "Olive Garden" is a really big deal, but no such luck. I endured six years of going to "Supercuts" or "Fantastic Sam's." Not that they did a bad job, you can only screw my hair up so much, but these were hair salons, not barbershops.

Now I'm in Nashvegas and I've found "Dodson's." They have a trophy bass mounted on the wall next to a picture of John Wayne. There is a Snap-on Tools calendar that's about three years old hanging by the entrance and and all of the barbers still put tonic in their hair to slick it back in a pompadour. A barbershop is just a man's place. I can't explain it, but finding one is going to make this transition that much easier.

Alrighty Then

I'm not even gonna talk about how the Vols got beat and the Titans got embarrassed. I will say that the Preds are on a roll, but there is a lot of season to go. Instead I would like to say goodbye to the miserable little town where I currently live. We finish packing tomorrow, we load the truck Tuesday and Wednesday we (as in The Girlfriend and I) become Nashvillians. Wow. I quit my job last Friday, I close on the house this Thursday and by next weekend this backwater village will be a distant memory in my rear view mirror. To that end, I won't be around for a couple of days, moving the ole PC and all. Y'all let me know if I miss any thing.

Happy Halloween!

I'm not really a holiday kinda guy. I wish they would all just go away. The hustle and bustle, the preparation, the aggravation, all of it makes me want to crawl into a hole and hide until February. Until this last Halloween. The girlfriend probably won't like this post, in fact she will probably make me take it down, but I will tell you about the best Halloween ever.

It was a little chilly last night, I had to work late and didn't get home 'til sevenish, which was fine. It meant that I probably missed most of the trick-o'-treaters. The girlfriend went to her sister's to trick-o'-treat with her niece. I spoke to her about the time I was going home and she said she would be home late and that I should go ahead and eat without her. I heated up some pizza and messed around on the computer and reveled in the fact that the door bell wasn't ringing at all. No Halloween pests at Casa de Bat. Around nine or so the bell rings. Damn! I thought I was going to make it without a single rug rat begging for candy. I thought about ignoring it, but it was persistent so I went to the door, beating the dogs back so that they wouldn't eat one of the little tykes.

I opened the door, got one good look, didn't know what to do or say, and closed the door again. A familiar voice said "Please let me inside, it's chilly out here." I slowly opened the door again. There stood the girlfriend. She was wearing a pink wig, a witches hat, some calf length black boots and........well, that was pretty much it except for the tiny thong and leopard print bra. Bada bing! I hope that everybody else's Halloween ended like mine and everybody got excellent treats like I did.