A New Day

I don't know what it is about the night that makes me so insane. The moon? A hormonal thing? I'm a werewolf? Who knows. It's much better today. The rage has been replaced by a feeling of acceptance and an eagerness to get restarted. I heard from her this morning, just a text to let me know she was ok. Exactly what I asked from her, no more, no less. I'm sitting here with a box of greeting cards she has sent me over the years. She has a thing for greeting cards and has always searched hard for the perfect one for each occasion. I had intended to go through them and wallow in misery but I looked at the first couple and read the lines that always seemed to appear at the end of each message she wrote. Never the same, but always with the same intent. Words like "I will love you always", "I love you with all my heart", and just plain "I love you." The fact that she once did love me will have to be enough. I couldn't look through the rest. I will have to make a decision soon about what to do with them. The cards and the pictures and the little nick nacks. I don't think they will go with me when I leave. Nothing good can come of that endeavor.

I'm on call all day, but tonight I'm going to an old friends house. He is married now, but there was a time when he went through a bad break up and I worked hard to help him get past it. Hopefully, he will do the same for me. It will be a welcome distraction at the very least.